A common question is often raised. Why do some Sikhs believe that Langar prepared by a Patit, such as a Mona, an adulterer, or a tobacco user, is not acceptable for the Khalsa of Guru Sahib? Isn’t love enough? If someone prepares Langar with prem, should that alone not matter?
At first glance, this argument appears compassionate. However, Gurmat does not measure prem by emotion or outward service alone. In Sikhi, prem is inseparable from obedience to Guru Sahib’s hukams.
If a person truly has prem for Guru Sahib, then why is that person not listening to the very basic hukam of keeping Kesh and refraining from the four Bajjar Kurehits? One cannot use prem as an excuse to ignore Guru Sahib’s clear maryada. Working in Langar once a week and then expecting Gursikhs to eat from one’s hands, while continuing to disobey Guru Sahib in daily life, is not humility. It is a contradiction.
If someone sincerely desires that Gursikhs eat from their hands, then the Gurmat path is clear. That person should first offer their head to Guru Sahib, take Amrit, and live within the maryada. To pressure or emotionally coax Gursikhs into breaking their own maryada, without reforming oneself, is an irresponsible act.
Guru Sahib makes it very clear that divided loyalty and selective obedience have no value:
ਸਲਾਮੁ ਜਬਾਬੁ ਦੋਵੈ ਕਰੇ ਮੁੰਢਹੁ ਘੁਥਾ ਜਾਇ ॥
ਨਾਨਕ ਦੋਵੈ ਕੂੜੀਆ ਥਾਇ ਨ ਕਾਈ ਪਾਇ ॥੨॥
(Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 474)
One who sometimes bows and sometimes refuses the Master is already lost. Such actions are false and gain no acceptance.
From the Gurmat perspective, if a person does not obey even the most basic hukams of Guru Sahib, that person cannot be called a Premi of Guru Sahib. There is, of course, a difference between ignorance and stubbornness. An ignorant but innocent person should be lovingly informed about Guru Sahib’s maryada. But if, after knowing the Maryada, a person still insists on committing the four Bajjar Kurehits, then it is safe to say that what they display is not prem, but mere show.
This principle is summed up beautifully in the Rehitnama:
ਰਹਿਤ ਪਿਆਰੀ ਮੁਝ ਕੋ ਸਿਖ ਪਿਆਰਾ ਨਾਹਿ ॥
(Rehitnama Bhai Desa Singh)
Guru Sahib loves the Sikhs’ disciplined way of life, not just the Sikhs’ outward identity. Rehit is central, not optional.
True humility in Sikhi is not about bowing the head for display. True humility lies in obedience to Guru Sahib’s hukams. Without obedience, humility becomes empty performance.
Because of this understanding, many Gursikhs choose to eat Langar only when it is prepared by Gursikhs who live within Guru Sahib’s maryada. This practice is not based on hatred, ego, or a sense of superiority. It is simply an effort to follow Gurmat instructions regarding food and conduct.
Bhai Daya Singh Ji’s Rehitnama states clearly:
ਭੋਜਨਾਦਿ ਮੁੰਡਿਤ ਨਾਲ ਛਕੇ ਤਨਖਾਹੀਆ ॥
(Rehitnama Bhai Daya Singh Ji)
Eating food with a Mona or non-Sikh is considered a breach of conduct.
Similarly, Bhai Chaupa Singh Ji instructs:
ਗੁਰੂ ਕਾ ਸਿਖ… ਆਪਣੇ ਲੰਗਰ ਰਸੋਈ ਵਿਚ ਸਿਖ ਰਖੇ ॥
ਹੁਕਈ, ਟੋਪੀਆ, ਭਾਦਣੀ, ਚੋਰ, ਯਾਰ, ਜੂਏਬਾਜ਼, ਕੁਰਹਿਤੀਆ ਨਾ ਰਖੈ ॥
(Rehitnama Bhai Chaupa Singh Ji)
A Guru’s Sikh should keep only a Sikh in the Langar and kitchen, and should not include those who engage in kurehits or other forbidden conduct.
In conclusion, Gurmat does not deny the value of service. Langar is a sacred institution rooted in equality and seva. But in Sikhi, seva must walk hand in hand with obedience. Prem is not proven by words, emotions, or occasional service. Prem is proven by living according to Guru Sahib’s hukams. Without that foundation, claims of prem remain hollow.